Hey Hey! Saying hi from my glamorous Midwestern couch! It is always hilarious to me that I can be sitting here in sweats judging these beauties who even on their worst days are 1000x more gorg and glam than I will ever be. Not that that will ever stop me.
All the ladies wore black last night in solidarity of the Time's Up initiative. Which was powerful, but I am sure made selecting dresses much harder. Black is so tough to make interesting on screen and in photos. So many of these dresses looked so much better doing the show or on stage.
Let's start with who got it right...
My top of the top of the Best list are these three beauties. Diane came in under the radar and found a new way to wear a cape. Stunning! Penelope also went full movie star with an off shoulder train number. And My absolute favorite was Jessica Biel. The drape and architectual detail is perfection. Love the hair and make up on all of these ladies too. So important!
Other ladies at the top...
From left: Laura's dress looks boring here, but I swear this was amazing. Kendall looks young and fun. Love her hair with this. Allison's I liked (no the hair), but on stage it did come off a little skater costume. Maybe by design given her movie? And Nicole, always impeccable.
From Left: Viola looks amazing. Love the mix of natural hair with the classic dress and pretty necklace. Margot's dress is so good, I bet that the embroidery is incredible in person. Millie wears the perfect look for a kid. A kid who we all want to be. Naomi has never aged and I love the pleating of this dress.
From Left: Emma's dress does not stun here, but on stage it was really good. Sparkled just enough and fit perfectly. Traces owns this entire look and I love it. I do not know this girls name (on SMILF which looks so good), but I want to wear this entire look! Sarah always looks a little dark, but this was pretty.
There were some Meh moments...
There were a lot of plays on suiting and tuxedos. Reese's and Evas fell flat for me. I can appreciate the look, but it could be better. Alicia is a fave and this came off Queen Victoria esque. Meryl looks pretty, but she needs some sort of dazzle.
Pants under skirts. SUCH a hard look and there were many.
You can barely tell that Maggie's look has pants. I think she pulls it off and I love those earrings. Brie's pose makes cringe and the top is not quite fitting. But I do not hate it. A little Audrey Hepburn vibe going. Christina's looked great onstage actually, but this photo proves this look can go bad fast.
There was not as much skin as usual, but some
Kate had on a headband that I was not into and this is definitely something only she can wear. I am sort of eh on this look. Catherine looks amazing, don't get me wrong. I would die to look like this at 36 let alone 48, but the no pants illusion look feels forced on her. And Sharon Stone was on stage in this and looked incredible. Do I love it? No, but she is another person who either has the best doctors ever or lives in a cryogenic chamber.
And now the bottom of the worst...
From Left: Susan or Susan. This looks like what a recent college grad looks like walking into her first interview. It is ill fitting and that shirt tuck makes me want to die. She also had a pony with a bow. No. And you have got to love Kelly, but the princess gown with the strange gold sleeve is awful. The point of the bodice to the skirt is so costume. This look on Claire Foy (THE QUEEN!) is devastating. I worship a good tux on the red carpet, but this is tragic. There is nothing interesting about it, the fit is not good, and the severity of the entire look is awful. I get the sentiment given the message of the night, but this is not the way. Mandy Moore came straight from a friends wedding where she served as a bridesmaid. What is this?! The fabric, the cut/necklaine, and that sash. It is tragic. Her make up is the only saving grace.
Other ones that were on the not so great list
From Left: Gal's look is so mother of the bride I had to look twice. The rucheing on its own is tragic. Michelle looks amazing, but this jacket choice is not fit for the globes. She should have chosen something more glam. Shailene's look is one of those that was so good on stage (the top sparkled and was covered in stones!), but it photographs like a plaid wool turtleneck from limited too. Sorry, girl. That too hair too. Angelina can wear anything, absolutely anything, and she wears this? It is a head scratcher to me. She has gone so matronly the last few years and I do not get it. In all fairness Dakota's dress is gorgeous on the back. Crystals, embroidery, train! But we do not see the back, Dakota. As a wise friend messaged me "it looks like my high school homecoming dress." yep.
Halle, oh how I long to be as gorg as you. But this dress does NOT belong at the Globes! It looks like a nightgown. A bad one. Elizabeth is a young lady. Why would you dress like a nun?! This is beyond grandma and even a smidge little girl. Not a good combo. I love Michelle and she has had so many good red carpet moments. This dress looks straight from the rack at forever 21. The fancy section. SJP has so much going on with this look that it is hard to figure out what is wrong with it. The tulle, the lace, the corset, the belt, the brooch (?), the sleeves, and satin overlay? Then she adds the buckle shoes we all want to cry. Of all the black dresses in the world she has access to, how is this the one she lands on? I will never understand it! Drives me nuts.
Whew that was fun. Too cruel?! Would love to know your faves and misses!