(Almost) One Year In
I wish I could say that it feels crazy that a year has gone by, but honestly it feels like a lifetime since bringing our little guy home. Those first couple months of complete exhaustion and cloudy hormone-crazy brain seem far in the distance. Yet the time in between really has flown by. Now that he is more like a person and less like a baby, it seems like I have graduated in a sense.
From endless self doubt on the many details of raising a baby, to pouring over baby blogs filled with crazy women ranting about what I was doing wrong, and now I feel a sense of peace knowing that none of that matters. Maternal extinct feels so much easier to channel once your hormones have settled down, your baby sleeps through the night, shows you his personality, and you finally realize that even if you did a fraction of what you do for him now he would still turn out to be great. Because lets get serious, you are probably doing a pretty bang up job, it just does not feel like that most of the time. Or does it ever?
For those of you in the newborn trenches, this too shall pass. And I say that in the best and worse sense of it. You will miss that tiny little bundle, that smell of perfection, those first glances of recognition, and the complete excitement of becoming a parent to an actual human being (that actually does not go away completely). You will then pass those milestones that feel selfish, but really just make you a better person. Sleeping through the night for you and the baby, getting on a bit of a schedule, being able to translate every coo and cry, and figuring out how to have a life and baby at the same time.
We all have a different way of parenting, of raising these tiny humans, and I could not be more glad to be a part of it. Especially with the ladies that I connect with on the subject. My friends, my readers, my long distance Facebook moms, because we all have no idea what we are doing. Even almost a year in and I know everything that I know now will be useless months because he will be a different little guy. But we are making it through, loving the process or at least embracing it, and hoping to laugh a lot together along the way.